Sex and the Seven

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

This ain't no love thang...we're just kickin' it

So I'm sitting here feeling like a virgin blogger since I haven't taken a stab at this in a long time, but feeling compelled to get something off of my chest. When Nia Long and Larenz Tate both insisted that "This ain't no love thang...we're just kickin' it", in direct opposition to the glaring reality of their "situation" they hit the mark right on the head. This short, dismissive, statement is pregnant with meaning and symbolism. Men and women simply can't admit to mutual attraction, intense feeling, and a desire to build...at least not right away...and God forbid...not on a "timeline". It's starts with the man in the "situation"...unfailingly he will not want a "title". He may treat you like his woman, lay claim to "his stuff", and even take you home to meet his mama....but at the end of the day you are "dating". And please, don't get it twisted. Reliably, the woman, if she has even a hint of old fashion in her, (or if she's talked it over with her mother who will say "Baby...a man doesn't want to be troubled with these things, just keep him happy, he's not going anywhere"), will not want to rock the boat or trouble the waters by asking the dreaded "where is this going?". So instead, she will cloak herself in nonchalance, smile pretty for the camera, and be the perfect woman who never argues, doesn't get mad when he "forgets" to call, and hardly blinks an eye when his phone rings and he looks at it but doesn't answer. All this to soak up his praise when he says, "See that's why I like you, you don't complain and you don't get mad over small stuff." But this "small stuff" is left over for the woman to bitch, whine and moan about to her friends who can "feel her", which is simply code for "I'm going to agree with you because I got the same problem girl." "This ain't no love thang...we're just kickin' it." If you are a man or a "dating" woman in denial you are probably thinking "that's Hollywood", but something about it catches the essence of Black dating. Supposedly there is this magical moment when things become clear. At least that's what a man thinks. According to a man who shall remain nameless its ok to "Be good "friends" and one day get married", but that doesn't happen in real life. But then again...neither would Love Jones.
(Dedicated to the homies...you know who you are).

Saturday, November 12, 2005

I've been hosed

So, it's official... I found out this morning, and I was crushed. It has changed my whole outlook, and I don't think I'll be able to think of California in the same way ever again. Shock and amazement overtook my body, and I stood speechless, staring at the computer screen that revealed the truth from which I wanted to hide.

It has been confirmed that... Laguna Beach is not a true reality television show. Yes, the producer has admitted that the show has "structured but unscripted plot creations". This means that the love triangle, or love square, between Jason, Jessica, Alex and LC was fixed! And that it's not a coincidence that almost all of the characters are moving to LA, just in time for the filming of season 3! I feel so betrayed. So hurt. So bamboozled. And what's next? Is Punk'd all a facade? Is America's Next Top Model rigged? Is Santa Claus not even real?

I know we all scramble to find out the truth, about life, about people, about the past (and about TV shows), but I truly believe it's sometimes better to live with the wool over your eyes. Lesson to be learned: don't go searching around for the truth, cuz you just might find it.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

2005's Slow Goodbye

My Beautiful Black Women-

2006 is upon us. 2005 escapes from us like fresh memories of junior high. And while my bills have piled all year long, my weight has fluctuated, my dreams have changed form: one thing has remained the same: God's patience with my inconsistent life.

I find myself in the club one night, throwing back my fourth vodka tonic, the next night crying in bed and asking God what my purpose is. I've run to men, money, and even a nice pair of shoes for a sense of relief, and all along, God watched me from above, waiting for me to fall again and come back home.

God has also given me something else this year: and that is good health and friends such as you all that have never faltered. We may never see each other like we used to or talk every second, but what is inside cannot be broken, and you are all apart of me.

As 2006 makes its way around this corner, I cannot help but think about our lying president, earthquakes and hurricanes that have shown no mercy, and who knows what else is to come. And I know this for sure now: you're career doesn't matter in the end, and neither does your money. Living in the light does, and I pray that we all continue to shine, and continue to dream bigger than the parameters this crazy world places on us with each new year...